ARc

truth unspoken

slower now, quicker to ask for help

but still believing i am functioning

until i see close friends and family

tighten their lips and draw

their faces blank to not reflect

their realization that i am less

i know that labor of attempted

expressionless non-revelation

as i stand beside a precious friend

whose voice is comely but whose

sense of pitch and harmony

functions not with the music

written on the page

it’s love that lets the obvious

be unspoken

Lent begins

Fat Tuesday excesses

groaning bodies awaken

to Ash Wednesday reminders

of sorrow and repentance

among the ‘shoulds’

if only one day didn’t mean

far more than the other

we move rather than sol

diffused by layered clouds

gray light barely perceptible

in its gradual brightening

nonetheless hints at the speed

at which our earth turns

for us to great the ‘rising’ sun

depth matters

 haiku

sapphire sky turns pale

losing the depth to ICE blue

intimidation

beyond

 haiku

the beyond opens

perspective to me, keeps me

properly humble

renew

 haiku

whispered blue morning

gentle fog cushioning dawn

“sleep in, rest and heal”

orange dawns

haiku

orange dawns in winter

mauve and pink shun cold mornings

shiver-wrap in gold

soften the blow

when blow is softened

and time given to absorb

hope for recovery

end of what was

years ago, i sighed to climb

onto my new mattress

re-living the loss

knowing i  no longer slept

on the same bed i’d shared with him

who had been the center of my world

a dozen years i’d lived without him

until i needed to give up the home

in the hills he’d built for me

where we’d shared, in awe, sunrises

snowy mountain Cascade peaks

and visits by wild animals and birds

who’d grown accustomed to our intrusion into their natural grounds

too benumbed by the downsizing

of decades of gatherings

to miss what had been stuff of our lives

until the final item was itemized

for the estate sale with proceeds

to go to our church

as i lock the door on the estate goods

i stagger, empty, gutted

and drive to the cemetery to talk

but i cannot talk with my Earl

only look back up the hill to the home

which is no longer ours

and weep

and then, knowing he is in my heart,

wherever i choose to go to die,

i am at peace

fractured skyline

haiku

cerulean cloud

slit, shattered by star-fire

insistent glow-gold

cannot, but can

i could not take on her cancer

but i could be with her for tests

and treatments and have her

with me for times of recovery

i cannot heal our society’s lack

of faith, courage to face the truth

or refusal to take responsibility

for the care of others

but i can be there to support

and encourage my friends

and love my family with all of me

however inadequate for the enormity

of the task, knowing that i

am not alone in caring

distorted interplay

play of reality seen

through reflection on glass window

our minds have learned

to differentiate

but not always

at times the image seems reality

as when the power of words

distort our actions

under the influence

of marketing, disinformation

propaganda

winter 25-26

haiku

 chill but not cold here

while southern states see winter

in its white glory

gray at four

haiku

gray fog dense at four

dissolving by six lends hope

of bright-hued sunrise

Missouri sky in Oregon

 Missouri sky in Oregon

today the blue-purple-gray clouds

actually drop rain, as their appearance

had hinted to a Midwesterner

that they might

whispered sunrise

whispered sunrise

mauve and burnt-orange

muffled by mist

gratitude

looking over the stutters and chaos

i have created over the last

eighteen months, i realize

i have been less mentally sharp

than perhaps at any other time

in my life

and realize, as well, the tremendous

loving support given by my family

that kept me going as well as i could

fierce winter sunrise

haiku

fierce winter sunrise

burnt-orange horizon fading

from Sol’s red anger

new TV and movies

for all the wham and zap

bodies skewered and blown apart

colors dazzling the watcher’s vision

recently i find i am happier reading