soften the blow

when blow is softened

and time given to absorb

hope for recovery

end of what was

years ago, i sighed to climb

onto my new mattress

re-living the loss

knowing i  no longer slept

on the same bed i’d shared with him

who had been the center of my world

a dozen years i’d lived without him

until i needed to give up the home

in the hills he’d built for me

where we’d shared, in awe, sunrises

snowy mountain Cascade peaks

and visits by wild animals and birds

who’d grown accustomed to our intrusion into their natural grounds

too benumbed by the downsizing

of decades of gatherings

to miss what had been stuff of our lives

until the final item was itemized

for the estate sale with proceeds

to go to our church

as i lock the door on the estate goods

i stagger, empty, gutted

and drive to the cemetery to talk

but i cannot talk with my Earl

only look back up the hill to the home

which is no longer ours

and weep

and then, knowing he is in my heart,

wherever i choose to go to die,

i am at peace

fractured skyline

haiku

cerulean cloud

slit, shattered by star-fire

insistent glow-gold

cannot, but can

i could not take on her cancer

but i could be with her for tests

and treatments and have her

with me for times of recovery

i cannot heal our society’s lack

of faith, courage to face the truth

or refusal to take responsibility

for the care of others

but i can be there to support

and encourage my friends

and love my family with all of me

however inadequate for the enormity

of the task, knowing that i

am not alone in caring

distorted interplay

play of reality seen

through reflection on glass window

our minds have learned

to differentiate

but not always

at times the image seems reality

as when the power of words

distort our actions

under the influence

of marketing, disinformation

propaganda

winter 25-26

haiku

 chill but not cold here

while southern states see winter

in its white glory

gray at four

haiku

gray fog dense at four

dissolving by six lends hope

of bright-hued sunrise

Missouri sky in Oregon

 Missouri sky in Oregon

today the blue-purple-gray clouds

actually drop rain, as their appearance

had hinted to a Midwesterner

that they might

whispered sunrise

whispered sunrise

mauve and burnt-orange

muffled by mist

gratitude

looking over the stutters and chaos

i have created over the last

eighteen months, i realize

i have been less mentally sharp

than perhaps at any other time

in my life

and realize, as well, the tremendous

loving support given by my family

that kept me going as well as i could

fierce winter sunrise

haiku

fierce winter sunrise

burnt-orange horizon fading

from Sol’s red anger

new TV and movies

for all the wham and zap

bodies skewered and blown apart

colors dazzling the watcher’s vision

recently i find i am happier reading

in a funk

in a funk

weighed down by non-response

and whining persons who demand

without realizing their selfishness

but it is a mood i’ve had before

and needed to work my way out of

i’ll need to do that again

now the times of gray

haiku

now the times of gray

seep into tender pearl green

harbingers of spring

as ringmaster sleeps

haiku

as ringmaster sleeps

lion, roaring, pads the tent

kid’s balloon quivers

cruise crew

cruise crew

two beautiful daughters

one bright, lovely granddaughter

and old me, again at table

delighting in fine food

looking forward to dessert

and as close to a round of cribbage

and granddaughter’s time

before work will allow

laughing, teasing, giggling

venting our dismay with our government’s sneering at law

and limitations of power

and the local physical and world-

wide harm being caused

but mostly warming to the loving

support and enjoyment we give

to each other

priceless

and deeply valued

it’s true

“You are braver than you believe,

stronger than you seem, and

smarter than you think,”

Winnie the Pooh declares

and, as a family practice physician

i have watched so many persons

prove Winnie the Pooh truthful

cloud game

haiku

navy tracks of cloud

line sunrise like jet contrails

Nature’s tic tac toe

penguins

penguins, flightless, swim

in ‘rafts’ of numerous fellow creatures

so individuals survive

seals, whales, sea predators

overwhelmed by numbers

alone, each would be a quick snack

on land, they slide on their bellies

or walk upright awkwardly

causing a group to be called

a ‘waddle’

fascinating ‘little men in tuxedos’

some are four feet tall, other tiny

and all but unknown until only

two and a half centuries ago

brown ice

rapid expansion of ICE

almost inevitably will bring

lessened oversight

which means slackened mean streaks

within persons who believe

they are enforcing moral good

against “enemies within”

we are human, generation to generation