longed for

so far away

but still belonging

wanted, longed for

bringing with a hug

an inundation of joyful tears

overcome

emotional blow bowed me to rest

my head on the chair back in front of me

i could not stand up without my son

holding me as i sobbed

my Ted had flown in from the Midwest

as a surprise set up with the family

not seeing him for a year

or more at a time

i knew the hunger of longing

but had not realized how the deep

the pining ached until he held me

in his arms

excited or confused

“Are you excited

about this morning’s surprise?”

from hints and slips of the tongue

over the past two weeks

i was confused more than excited

since i’d been led to believe

we were going for high tea

then out to lunch

at the spaghetti factory

but who would want lunch

after eating high tea?

my daughter laughed after parking

around the corner from the senior living center i will be joining

i walked beside her, looking toward her

to answer her questions so i did not look

through the window at my family

waiting in the library

not until we were in the lobby, still wondering what was going on,

did my son appear around the corner

he had flown in from Omaha to surprise

me and inspect the apartment i will

be moving into to complete the family

giving approval and laughter

now the apartment feels like home

delegating

a man who cannot reach competence

but has bluffed, bullied, and threatened

on his scramble-climb to power

chooses non-threatening unqualified

heads for departments beneath him

that he wishes to fail so he will have

a ready-made scapegoat

for when they do

curb

some persons feel

deep discomfort

at change

or unsettling disorientation

with lack of foundation

when confronted by

the irreconcilable

right is white, divinely given

anything else must be

wrong and therefore evil

without realizing they are

trying to restrain

vast spirit within their own

limitations

even i

retribution, ‘getting even’

are the steps a child takes

before she realizes her inner

strength and ability to ‘live

and let-live’ in the effort

to heal, not only herself

but those around her

message

the crumbling wood barn

warped boards garbling the message

“God bless America”

still speaking of our country’s love

of our Creator

musky trial balloon

wealth does not entitle anyone

legally or morally to propose

 ‘punishment’

for a special counsel serving

in his appointed office

so, your suggestion of rebuke

sent out to judge popular response to

public reprimand for an individual

doing his job will expose

the offensiveness of your intentions

nor does power warrant

retribution against fellow officials

who have disagreed or opposed

such actions fragment the rule of law

which is the foundation

of our democracy depends

respect comes hard

respect comes hard

when money is valued

when those who gave time and health

to serve others are deemed ‘suckers’

respect comes hard

for those who do not honor the sacrifice

by those whose lives are then given

in love to care for the damaged

family of three

fawn nearly sure on spindly legs

gangles away from slender stag

to stand in the intersection

traffic slows, stops, drivers and passengers smile and wait

as doe peeps over the wooden

fence she has leaped to get to a garden

fawn struggles up on the lawn

stage follows, peers at doe, finds

tall grass beneath a coastal pine

until doe leaps again the fence

nuzzles her fawn, springs over

the north hedge, which the fawn

traverses between low trunks

and stag bulls through

gracious response

quietly proud

of those who can

return graciousness

for devastating lies

making dignity

great again

in the meantime

our whiner in chief

to heal what he has broken

bit so many harmed

expect

if truth not honored

or  ‘other’ deemed inhuman

expect betrayal

frank

deciding to be frank

when all subtle clues escape notice

i have privately warned the offender

that tolerance will no longer be gifted

treasures are personal

no room in the inn

for treasures i’ve loved and lived with

i won’t give them away to family

as they have loved treasures of their own

so, a sale and lots of donations

are in the not-too-distant future

this down-sizing is almost as grueling

as getting old

family chooses

haiku

family chooses

joy of mountain view for me

with green trees for peace

trials

i disagree with the plea to

“save us from the times of trial”

because it is through trial

that we grow and earn depth

trials will happen

the sooner we accept that as a fact of life

the less we lose of time and effort

to “why me?”

i pray instead that our lord

please stay with us

to strengthen us through them

paper to recycled life

paper to recycled life

more than two decades’ worth

of saved piles, notebooks, filing cabinets

accumulations of old poems, duplicate

plays for multiple readers, sketches

of scenes, descriptions of characters

now shopping bags filled for recycling

and, oh, the surprise found:

grandchildren’s stories and poems

in fat, just-learning-to-print letters

preference

competing priorities

configuration v view

bookcases v snow-capped mountains

home-like arrangement without peaks

v panoramic beauty and trees

and open area with western foothills

only a lovely walk away

dawn sings

sunrise glows muted

through light fog

its brilliant awakening of day

hushed but still singing of the glory

of our gifted world